From how to eat an ice-cream cone ("The only thing one person could hand to another that might possibly be more dangerous is a live hand grenade on which the pin had been pulled five seconds earlier")to how to be a good person ("Caring is the cause of most everything that is bad"), this collection of "timeless wisdom and oracular advice" remains laugh-out-loud hilarious, and it might just change the way you think about things. Originally published as three separate volumes in the 1970s, and hailed as "tight-assed in the very best sense" by Kurt Vonnegut, Rust Hills's autobiographical screed offers a mostly charming (if sometimes ribald) wealth of "apparently complicated solutions to apparently simple problems," with a healthy dose of self-deprecation and more than the occasional morsel of profound insight. You know a fussy man (or woman) who will appreciate this classic of American humor.